Explore Norveilex’s original short fiction. Browse a topic below or discover the newest stories from across the collection.
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A Perfectly Reasonable Amount of Bronzer
A Perfectly Reasonable Amount of Bronzer “Now here’s the thing, Merle. What you’re describing to me is a success.” Merle Tackett had come in wearing a fishing shirt…
The Scratch-Off Sunscreen Miracle of Pelican Bight
The Scratch-Off Sunscreen Miracle of Pelican Bight “—see, that’s the thing about the Doubler Dazzler,” Dwight Pilcher said, working the corner of a hotel key card across ticket…
Please Tell the Sandwich How Your Marriage Makes You Feel
Please Tell the Sandwich How Your Marriage Makes You Feel The printer played a brass fanfare and awarded professional standing to lunch. Celia Broome caught the glossy card…
The Ten-Million-Dollar Prophecies of a Five-Dollar Mustache
The Ten-Million-Dollar Prophecies of a Five-Dollar Mustache Cal Wetherby had intended to spend twelve minutes at Bellwether Downs. Rita Salazar had promised him a two-dollar voucher, a commemorative…
The Most Respectable Dildo Salesman on Maple Crescent
The Most Respectable Dildo Salesman on Maple Crescent Martin Puckle had not yet spoken to his first customer, and already the catalog was fighting him. It had wedged…
The Mustache Who Found Grandpa Stuck to Somebody’s Chin
The Mustache Who Found Grandpa Stuck to Somebody’s Chin “You cannot reject my application because I do not know my grandfather’s name.” Percival gave the folded hand towel…
The First Barbecue Was Sixty-Six Million Years Early
The First Barbecue Was Sixty-Six Million Years Early “Do not touch anything outside the blue housing.” Marty Pritchard had both arms inside the blue housing. “That instruction would’ve…
The Night the Aliens Gave Everyone Robert Goulet Tattoos
The Night the Aliens Gave Everyone Robert Goulet Tattoos Marcy Bell had spent eleven years at Golden Years Harbor learning that anything parked in the fire lane eventually…
The Mustache That Terrorized the Grand Canyon
The Mustache That Terrorized the Grand Canyon Martin Pindle held his phone at arm’s length, tilted his chin three degrees toward Arizona, and tried to determine whether his…
Biscuit Went Full Throttle and NASCAR Completely Lost Its Mind
Biscuit Went Full Throttle and NASCAR Completely Lost Its Mind The simulator lost control because Biscuit wanted somebody to throw his tennis ball. Lenny Vargas was halfway through…
The Taco Contest That Required Forensic Analysis
The Taco Contest That Required Forensic Analysis Nate Pritchard had a stainless-steel ruler pressed against the edge of his taco tray when Dean Wexler walked up behind him.…
The Ham on Gordon Pike’s Head Was Not a Hairpiece
The Ham on Gordon Pike’s Head Was Not a Hairpiece By the time Gordon Pike realized the garment steamer was cooking his toupee, the damage had become philosophical.…