So you want to write a love song? Cool. You’re about to join the ranks of millions who’ve rhymed “heart” with “apart” and thought they were Shakespeare. You know who else thought that? Your uncle Gary. The one who brings his guitar to Thanksgiving. But wait—you don’t want to sound cheesy? Good luck with that….
Congratulations. You’ve just made the second-worst financial decision of your life. (The first was that timeshare, but let’s not talk about that.) You bought a rental property because some guy on YouTube with a Lamborghini told you it was “passive income.” You know what’s passive? Death. Everything else requires work, and landlording requires the kind…
That drawer full of ancient phones and cables? Yeah, that one. The one you open twice a year, stare into like it’s the abyss, then close while muttering “might need those.” You won’t need those. But here’s the thing – throwing them away feels like betrayal. These devices saw you through your emo phase. They…
So you want to buy a used car. Nobody wants to buy a used car. You need to buy a used car. There’s a difference. Want is for things like vacations and good wine. Need is for antibiotics and used Corollas that smell like someone else’s mistakes. But here you are, checkbook in hand, ready…
So you want to build a climbing wall in your garage? Let’s talk about your life choices for a second. Your spouse has already started browsing Zillow. Your kids are live-tweeting the disaster. The dog won’t make eye contact anymore. And somewhere, deep in the suburbs, an HOA board member just felt a disturbance in…
Alright, let’s talk about that drawer. You know exactly which one. The drawer that sounds like a medieval battle when you open it. The one where plastic unitaskers go to die. The drawer that’s basically a $400 junk museum dedicated to your poor impulse control and that time you watched too much QVC after three…