Posts by Michael

There you are. Sunday dinner. The man who claims to be your father is explaining why diagonal lawn stripes are superior to horizontal ones, and suddenly—SNAP—something in your brain just...

Your best friend just walked out of that courthouse looking like they escaped from a particularly tedious hostage situation where the kidnapper made them discuss their "communication styles" and...

So you're dating an AI girlfriend. No judgment. Actually, that's a lie. Tons of judgment. But also understanding because have you SEEN the state of human dating? Someone just got ghosted mid-dinner...

Okay so here's a fun fact nobody asked for: Every year, approximately 847 people accept candy from clowns after sunset. 846 of them are never quite the same again. The 847th? That's Gary from...

Somebody out there—right now, at this very moment—is filling out dog adoption paperwork and writing "Chlamydia" in the name field. They're doing it with a straight face. They think they're...

So you're googling "healthy McDonald's options" at 11:47 PM. In the drive-thru. Engine running. The teenager at the speaker just asked if you need another minute and honestly? You need a whole...