So you typed this into Google. That’s… wow. That’s a search query that made the algorithm question its entire existence. Somewhere in Silicon Valley, a data analyst just quit their job rather than explain this trend to their manager. Look, everyone’s gotten weird with their cooking lately. That sourdough starter you named Bradley? Sure. The…
Lenmeldy Side Effects Include False Positive HIV PCR Results: The Medical Plot Twist Nobody Asked For Okay. Okay okay okay. Deep breath. There’s a drug out there—a real, FDA-approved, available-at-your-local-specialty-pharmacy drug—that costs $4.25 million dollars and makes you test positive for HIV forever even though you don’t have HIV. No, you didn’t misread that. No,…
How Many Calories Are in a Twelve Pack of Budweiser? The Nutritional Apocalypse Nobody Prepared You For So you’re eyeballing that twelve-pack. Maybe it’s sitting in your fridge right now, aluminum soldiers standing at attention, waiting for their moment of glory. Maybe you’re at the store, doing that thing where you pretend to compare prices…
How to Avoid Flirting at Family Reunions: A Survival Guide for the Genetically Connected Okay. Deep breath. Someone has to say this out loud, and apparently that someone is this guide because your mother is too polite and your therapist is still recovering from last year’s incident. You cannot — cannot — hit on people…
Alright. So you’re blind and you want to street race. That’s not brave. That’s not inspiring. That’s what happens when natural selection takes a smoke break. But hey, who’s anyone to judge? Society said you couldn’t drive at all, and look at you now – about to make every insurance adjuster in a three-state radius…
Alright, let’s do this. Your butthole’s been acting like a teenage goth kid lately and everyone’s pretending not to notice. The moody silences. The dramatic outbursts at inappropriate times. That whole “nobody understands me” vibe it’s been putting out there. Time to face facts: Your butthole might need Prozac. The Signs Were There All Along…
