Okay, let's get something straight. You've been paying into social security since disco was a thing, your 401k survived three recessions and a pandemic, and your reward is......
Category: Babble
The Beginner’s Guide to Pretending You Didn’t Crap Yourself at Target
Let's skip the foreplay here. You just shit yourself in Target. Not "had a little accident." Not "experienced some discomfort." You literally just turned your pants into a biohazard while standing...
Okay, so here's what happened. Somewhere between the pandemic, the dating app apocalypse, and that guy who asked if vaginas have bones, your vagina said "fuck it" and started preparing for the end...
The Etiquette of Pooping in a Public Pool: A Gentleman's Guide to Aquatic Disasters Disclaimer: This is satire. Anyone who actually follows this advice deserves whatever happens next. Look. Nobody...
How To Turn Your IBS Into An Excuse To Leave Any Conversation
The Ultimate Get-Out-of-Jail-Free Card for Social Disasters You're at Karen's house party. Again. She's cornered you by the cheese plate and launched into her forty-minute TED talk about why...
Hold Up, What? Yeah, you read that right. Not "motorcycle tips for the visually impaired." Not "adaptive riding techniques." Nope. This is full-send, eyes-closed, Jesus-take-the-handlebars content...